Follow by Email



Friday, March 2, 2018


Gloria Phifer

The word "regret?" the concept  is one of negativity. I don't see regret as a positive word. As I thought on this word...there is one basic regret I have...

When I was 15 yrs old, there was something going on in our home that made me afraid. I never shared anything that happened at home, I kept it all inside. My mother told me that nothing should be told that took place in our home. Secrecy, and yet it was known. We lived it every day. 

An X friend of my mother's sat in his yellow cadillac watching our house. My mother had told him it was over.

  I was scared of him. The yellow cadillac sat like a menace on the corner.

My mother said, "I'm going to begin picking your brother up from school because I am afraid of what "he" (the man in the car) might do. She said, "I am really worried about you. because he hates you." But, she never said she would pick me up from school. And this added to my fears.

I begin going into the bathroom, locking door and praying, asking God for help.

One day, as I was walking home from school, my arms were heavy as I carried my books and my legs felt like weight. I was under so much stress, tension and fear.

"Are you saved?" was a penetrating thought in my mind. Hmmm
this was a spiritual question I knew that. But, what was "saved?"

I begin a conversation with this thought. "I'm a good girl, I don't drink and I don't smoke...and you should see what my friends do" (There, that surely put me in a good light...right?_)

Now, you need to know that we rarely, except for a short time in Montana, went to church. I had listened to Billy Graham before.

Another penetrating thought...with two sentences. "You, must be born again. And, it is a straight and narrow way."

I knew in my heart I had not been born again. (Although I could not tell you or myself how to be born again.) and I knew instinctively that I was not on a straight and narrow way.

I also had a deep revelation that this was serious. This was a full commitment. I knew it would mean a complete change of life. I knew that it would mean giving up control. 

Why I did not ask questions, I do not know. Why I didn't respond in a different way...I do know...I did not want to give up control. What would this be like? What would it mean? Would He send me to Africa? 

I actually dismissed the thoughts, telling myself I was too young, maybe when I got older.

What is very interesting , I did not know how to be "born again." I did not know what the straight and narrow way really was. I just had the sense that it meant a complete surrender and I was afraid of complete surrender.

I even realized that God was trying to answer my prayers. Later in life I could see how He persisted. Our life became worse. I didn't know if life was worth living. I was moved basically every year...beginning a new school. Trying to fit in...missing wherever I had just come from. No stability. a mother who I felt hated me. Afraid to talk to anyone about the drinking, the violence, the abuse, the calling the police. 

There were nights I was up until 2:30...taking care of my brother making sure he was asleep...waiting for my mothers car to pull into the driveway so I could sleep. I was awake because I was scared. Or up until 4 after there had been a drunken fight and the police came.

I was missing a lot of school. One day, I went to get a pass to get back into class , the Vice Principal said, "If you miss one more day of school you are out of here." If only he had known...but would I have even told...there would be big consequences if I told anyone what was happening. 

It is a longer story. But my life spiraled down. I did marry at 19 to a wonderful young man. But he was sent to Alaska through the Air force for a year in isolation and I couldn't go with him. I came and lived with his family...who were strangers to me. I realized I was pregnant.

My daughter and I moved into an apartment and for 4 months I looked out at a brick wall. No one took care of my daughter but me. I had no support.

My husband returned and we moved to a small town. Through that year, I had realized I wasn't going to make it on my own. I knew I needed The Lord. After reading in the Book of John in the Bible I prayed and I was born again.

What had I been afraid of? This was "Peace." It was joy" It was Jesus!!!

So, my one regret is, that I didn't come to the Lord when He 1st spoke to me on my way home from school. Because in coming to Him I found The Person Who knows me and loves me unconditionally.

One statement that The Lord gave me, that changed so much in the way I saw myself was, "I was born for Him...He had planned my birth. He had brought me to Himself. I was born for Him.

Regrets can be put under the Blood of Jesus. We don't need to carry them. Grace and Mercy come with The Lord. He will take everything we have gone through and use it to help other people. 

Do not hesitate, as I did, in giving your life to The Lord. It is like walking in a dark place,
suddenly a Door opens and Light streams in  surrounding you and swallows up and destroys the darkness. 

Here is a prayer. "Lord Jesus, this life is so hard, I need and ask You to forgive my sins, I receive You as my Savior and my Lord. Come, Lord Jesus, into my life. I give myself and all that concerns me to You in Jesus Name Amen."

Sunday, February 18, 2018


Gloria Phifer

I live in a state that has four different seasons. I love the different seasons. the weather can change in the middle of the day or night.

I have been going through a lot in this season of life. I was 74 in December. I remember when I thought that was ancient. But, now I am there!  It is a season of letting go. Of finding new purpose.

I no longer have young children at home...who I miss, but I know I don't have the strength and endurance I had in my 20's and 30's.

I miss their teenage years when the phone (no cell phones then) rang off the hook. When other teenage friends cars filled our drive way. 

Then our children married. Which was a joy. It was a letting go.

Grandchildren were and are wonderful. But even that has changed; all but one grandchild is in their 20's now.

All our children live out of state. I miss them coming to the house.

My husband and I are now great grand parents...what a joy!!!

I have learned there is a lot of "letting go." Trusting The Lord.

I fight getting old. I don't want to think or act or dress old.''

I often joke that I am in "preservation." 

my husband had a heart attack a couple of years ago and that was an awakening. It left me shaken. Now, if he has heart burn or any symptom I get concerned (he doesn't seem to.)

There are many things to embrace...retirement...Bible studies...visiting with friends. Having my husband with me. Our children coming to visit. 

Yes. I am looking and searching in this new season of life.

I write and teach a Bible study and I mentor some younger gals which is a joy.

My prayer is that my life will bring Jesus Christ glory, at each stage and each season. Amen.

Saturday, February 17, 2018


Gloria Phifer

I am joining the FMF bloggers...we write on one word for 5 minutes...the word is "Why."

Do you have any "why's" in your life?

I have had are a few...

Why was I born to an 18 year old girl who didn't want a child?

Why didn't I ever know my real father?

Why did my step dad die when I was 10 yrs old?

why did my mother become an alcoholic?

I even asked The Lord one time why I was born into the family I was born into?

Time sometimes gives you the answers.

I am the only child that has my mother's grandchildren, her great grandchildren and now great, great grandchildren. 

Because of my childhood I saw my need for a Savior. At 22 I asked Jesus into my heart.

I have seen my family come to Jesus. My mother and 2nd stepdad, my grandmother, my aunt, my mother in law all accepted Jesus and are now in Heaven. 

We won't get all the answers to our "why's" until we get to Heaven. But sometimes we can look back and The Lord gives us some glimpse of "Why?"

Friday, January 19, 2018


Gloria Phifer

I am joining the bloggers at FMF...we write for 5 minutes on a  prompt it is ...intentional.

What am I intentional about? What are the things that I put energy
and intentionality into? To be intentional requires effort on my part. Some initiative.

The first one that comes to my mind, Is The Lord. I care about our relationship...I intentionally spend time with Him. Talk to Him and read His Word. In order to do this I have to be intentional take the prioritize that relationship

I want to be intentional about my love to and for others. This means  to reach out and care. To let them know that I care about them...and how are they doing? What can I pray with them about? 

I need to be intentional with my husband...cook him some meals...make a home that he enjoys...let him know I love him.

I want to be intentional to my children, grandchildren and now...great grandchildren. I want to put myself out there for them. I want them to know I love them and that I am here for them.

These are the intentional things that come to mind in 5 minutes.

Thursday, January 18, 2018


Gloria Phifer

Last week I wrote about something I was going through.

The enemy...the accuser of the brethren was telling me  I had not been enough in a season of my life.

One morning, I was watching Victoria Olsteen. She quoted the apostle Paul..."One thing I do...forgetting the past...I press on to the High Calling of Jesus Christ. " There was one thing Paul said he did. He forgot the past and pressed on.

Victoria also spoke about playing racket can never look backwards or the ball can hit you in the face.

This really spoke to my heart. I did the best I could in that season of my life. I loved and I cared. But, I cannot get stuck looking back, thinking maybe I wasn't enough. And truthfully, in my humanness I wasn't "enough." Only Jesus Christ is "Enough."

I must press forward in Christ to the calling He has on my life. 

Jesus Christ will always be "Enough!!!" I must fix my eyes on Him and not look back.

Tuesday, January 16, 2018


MY GOOD SHEPHERD...Painting by Gloria Phifer.
Gloria Phifer

I love my mom. She is in Heaven now and I am so thankful.

From abuse in childhood, many hurts and pains she turned 

to alcohol and drugs.

I became a Christian at 22...and I saw my mom, my step dad and my brother accept Christ.

My mom and step dad returned to the old life of alcohol and drugs, only this time it was 7 times worse. They became homeless.

There were times when I did not know where they were. (they lived in another state.)

The Lord would never let me quit praying for them. He would never let them go. He gave me scriptures on setting the captives free.

It was as if I was in this battle with The Lord. It was like an urgency in His love for them. He would never let them go.

A terrible happening seperated my mom and step dad. 7 yrs after that  happening, my step dad called me. he said he had not drank since that day. he wasn't sure if he would go to Heaven. We prayed together and I witnessed with him that He had accepted Jesus as His Savior. He died a few years later and is with The Lord.

My mother had a stroke. As I stood by her hospital bed, I heard her speaking the 23 Psalm and I prayed it with her. she told me she had many regrets. I told her , "Mom, Jesus has forgiven need to forgive yourself."

After my mother went to be with The Lord I was in a deep sleep. Right before I woke up I saw Jesus and my mom. He had his arm around her and they were both smiling at me. My mom looked radiant.

I thank Jesus that He would never let her go. She was one of His sheep and He constantly went after her.

I thank The Lord that my mom and step dad are in Heaven with Him.

I can say assuredly that The Lord is The Good Shepherd...He will leave the 99 sheep and go after the one continually until He has brought them into His safe Haven. Blessed be The Name of The Lord Jesus Christ....our Good and Faithful, Loving Shepherd.

Saturday, January 13, 2018


Gloria Phifer

Do you overthink things? I have been this week...I find myself looking back, wondering if I was good enough at being a mom?
It meant alot to me to be a good mom. 

all my children are grown. They are doing really well.

A friend helped me take the focus off myself and to look at my children.

She also reminded me there are no perfect parents. And she told me that I'm not Jesus, I'm not perfect. Wow!!! I do not have perfection and if I did there would be a source of pride. 

I realize too that it was the accuser of the brethren...accusing me. Trying to tell me I wasn't enough. 

I think it comes down to trusting. I've done my job. Now I trust in God...for great is the peace of my children for they are taught of The Lord...Isaiah.

Simplicity...Trust in The Lord for we are all His workmanship Created in Christ Jesus unto good works which He has ordained that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2) Trust. take the focus off myself and onto Him. 

I joined the bloggers at FMF today...the word was "simplify."