I WAS RAISED SOUTHERN STYLE.

7 years old...notice our 1949 black Ford.

 Gloria Phifer



New Mexico may not seem "southern", but I was raised with southern manners. My step dad (who died when I was 10), was a real cowboy. We were planning on moving to a ranch in Magdalena, New Mexico, but that never happened.

 He was a stickler for manners. (He was also a lover of pinto beans every night...with dessert  of molasses and peanut butter on bread. )

I was raised with manners and respect. Yes Mame...no Mame...yes sir...no sir, excuse me, please, thank you, your welcome etc. 

 ( in those days a  gentleman held open a door for a lady.)

 I was taught, that when an older person comes in the room, you get up and give them your seat.
 When I sat at the table, no elbows were allowed...one hand in my lap the other with the fork. When I finished eating, I had to ask"May I be excused?"

Television was just coming on the scene. We didn't have one, until I was 10, and there were only a few channels ( I never had to cover my eyes or ears.) In the mean time, we sat in the living room and listened to our radio, to Fibber Maggee and Molly, Father knows best and Dragnet. My mother also liked to listen to a new preacher...Billy Graham..."The Hour of Decision."

My mother absolutely would not have God's Name used in vain. (later when she became an alcoholic, I never did hear her use His Name in vain.) I could not even say "gee" or "gosh" because she said it was from God and Jesus Names.

For a short time, when we lived in Montana, my mother became interested in God. (She was home sick for New Mexico), We attended a small Presbyterian Church. I learned from my mother and the church, that Jesus is The Son of God, and He loves me. This foundational truth, became my saving grace in the years ahead. When we got back to New Mexico, there was no more church. And after my step dad died, my mother remarried.  She and her husband became alcoholics. Our life changed forever. 

But, back to respect. I respected and loved my country...America. In school, we gave the pledge of allegiance to the flag every morning. I respected my teachers. No one wanted to go to the principals office...(shivers). The only offenses were: passing notes, chewing gum, running in the halls, and throwing spit wads. 

I respected police. I respected military. My real father, and my two stepdads had both served in the 2nd World War. 

Marriage was respected. It was a disgrace to live together without being married..(.I only knew of that happening once.)

Gay, was being happy. Drugs, were what happened in the streets of New York with the gangs. Pot, was a tea pot or a coffee pot. 

When we had a phone...and often we didn't... it usually hung on the wall and always had a cord. One town we lived in, we had a party line. If there were two rings...it was our line. The thing is, the neighbors could listen in on the conversation.

I spent most of my time outside playing. In New Mexico, we were able to be outside most of the time. I roller skated. jumped rope. did my own gymnastics (I could do a back bend, stand ups, a flip in the air and cart wheels....I don't even think of it now...ha ha.)

I spent a lot of time reading. By the time I was 9, I was reading Zane Grey books. I loved comic books; especially "Wonder Woman" and the old classics made into comic books. I loved to draw, and I had an old fashioned ink pen with "Peacock blue" ink, that I would write with. I had a dairy...too bad I don't know where it is...it would be a hoot to see what I had to say. It had a lock and key, but I'm sure my mom could get into it. (Although...it wasn't shocking...probably who did I have a crush on?) 

I honestly feel sorry for the young people of this day. Nothing is shocking any more. (I am still shocked, but it doesn't look like the younger generation is...but hopefully...I am wrong.) 

I long for a decent movie. (That's why I watch Hall Mark Channel.)

I remember going to see "Gone with The Wind". When Clark Gable said the "D" word, at the end of the movie, everyone gasped. 

I long for a world with respect. I was so sad the other night when I was in Wal Mart. A child said something (nothing disrespectful) and the mother said, "Do you want me to slap you across the face?" 

I long for respect for women. A cover up might be nice and classy. 
Showing every thing a woman has, only makes her look cheap. 

I was not shown "respect" as a child. And, I know what that is like. I would admonish parents to respect and listen to their children. Care about them. Put away the smart phones and have some real communication.

Have a "supper time." All electronic devices disallowed.  When you are with your friends...don't keep looking at your phone...make eye contact...it could be...someone needs to be listened to. 

Well, that's my spill for the day. (I had a rough child hood with alcoholic parents and moving)...but I did know what it meant that I needed to respect.